I have the high sensitivity (HS) trait that exists in about 20% of humans. Six months ago, I found Dr. Elaine Aron’s HS work, inspiring me to protect and embrace these unique gifts.
“HS is a preference to process one’s experience more deeply. They notice things others miss and have stronger emotional reactions, both positive and negative,” writes Dr. Aron, clinical research psychologist and author of “The Highly Sensitive Person.”
The high sensitivity test on Dr. Aron’s website includes questions like: “I have a rich, complex inner life,” “I startle easily,” “I get rattled when I have a lot to do in a short amount of time,” “I try hard to avoid making mistakes or forgetting things,” and “I am conscientious.”
Many perceive themselves as weird, too much, or messed up before discovering their HS. When responsive people explore expert advice, research, and others’ stories, we can reset our perspectives for the better.
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Discovering Sensitivity:
Like many highly sensitive people (HSP), I’ve often felt overwhelmed and anxious. I’ve used numbing behaviors for most of my life, and removing layers of excess stimulation has been a beautiful slow, journey.
Dr. Aron says our caregiver attachments either supported or exacerbated the trait early on. Redesigning our perspective means we explore our past and lean into self-discovery.
She recommends examining things like our temperaments, the effects of schooling, our teenage years, and the cultural messages we’ve internalized.
My earliest environment mostly exacerbated my sensitive nature. I heard, “You’re too sensitive” often. I also heard: “You just care too much” from my exasperated corporate manager. I internalized the message that faster is better, rather than enjoying my slower, intuitive gifts.
Reading more about HSP, I felt like the last 20 years made way more sense. Other people don’t empathize as naturally, think as much, or feel everything as intensely. My deeper experiences are normal, healthy, and valuable.
Socially, HS people tend to enjoy better relationships. That felt good to read about.
“If nice people can be better detected through subtle cues that you as a responsive person can notice, then whether you are an introvert or an extravert, you will have better friends in the long run,” writes Dr. Aron.
Our responsive nature offers valuable social gifts like listening well, speaking seriously, and holding space for deeper thoughts.
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Nourishing Sensitivity:
Dr. Aron says HS people have a “finely-tuned nervous system,” which makes quality sleep and supportive nutrition essential. Both resonated strongly. I quickly feel notable differences in my body based on food and sleep.
“Noticing so much, feeling so much, and thinking about everything so much naturally means that they [HSP] also get more easily overwhelmed. So they need more down time,” writes Dr. Aron.
My boundaries and self-care practices feel even more essential. Managing my energy feels like one of the best ways to support my sensitive nature.
I pay more attention to all input now, the music I choose, the content I read, the places I go, etc. I also use several tech boundaries, communicate needs regularly, and take the space I need to feel more relaxed.
Generally, I’ve slowed my lifestyle down to enjoy my depth of experiences more fully. Meditation, yoga, and journaling help me ground and connect inward. When needed, an hour of low-stimulation time helps me reset.
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The biological HS trait offers numerous benefits, especially when we discover, understand, and nourish it. With practice, we can move from overwhelmed to empowered.
Dr. Aron shares some encouraging words at the end of “The Highly Sensitive Person” book:
“The times need us. An imbalance between the royal-advisor and warrior-king aspects of society, is always dangerous, but especially when science negates intuition and the ‘big questions’ are being settled without thoughtfulness, but according to what’s convenient at the moment. Your contributions are needed in this area more than any other.”
You can get more involved in the HS community by exploring Dr. Aron’s list of upcoming events.
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I publish inspiring, empowering content on self-actualization topics once a week. I include insights from personal experience, research, expert advice, and other’s stories. I use my professional journalism and research background to keep posts concise, empathic, and trustworthy.
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