Dr. Judith Orloff encourages us to embrace our sensitivities and develop strategies to prevent empathy overload.
I’d been enthusiastically immersed in highly sensitive people (HSP) research for months when I asked a favorite yoga teacher if she was highly sensitive. After chatting, she shared Orloff’s “The Empath’s Survival Guide” book.
I took Orloff’s 20-question self-assessment and checked every box (unless you consider San Francisco a “large city”). I felt like I’d just unlocked another level of self-knowledge, leading to more gifts and responsibilities.
“Being an empath is different from being empathetic. Being empathetic is when your heart goes out to someone else. Being an empath means you can actually feel another person’s happiness or sadness in your own body,” writes Orloff.
On her website, Orloffs wrote a post explaining how empaths take the experience of high sensitivity much deeper; it’s more about sensing subtle energies.
Orloff uses her nearly 20 years of conventional medical training, specializing in work with HSPs, and her personal experience as an empath to empower others.
“Empaths are the medicine the world needs. They can have a profound impact on humanity with their compassion and understanding. As you identify your special talents, you will find that you not only enrich your life but you can enrich the lives of others too. The key skill is to learn how to take charge of your sensitivities and specific strategies to prevent empathy overload,” shares Orloff.
Discovering my high-sensitivity and empath traits, and all the strengths involved, motivated me to seek calming strategies more intentionally. While I always knew I could be an “emotional person,” hearing Orloff’s advice and others’ empath stories feels eye-opening.
***
Orloff explains empaths
“Empaths are emotional sponges who absorb both the stress and the joy of the world. We feel everything, often to an extreme, and have little guard up between others and ourselves. As a result, we are often overwhelmed by excessive stimulation and are prone to exhaustion and sensory overload,” writes Orloff.
I remember doing a meditation class with another HSP yoga teacher who shared ways to separate my energy from others and consider whether I was feeling my emotions or someone else’s. That advice made a lot of sense.
“Empaths have an extremely reactive neurological system. We don’t have the same filters that other people do to block out stimulation. As a consequence, we absorb into our own bodies both the positive and stressful energies around us. We are so sensitive that it’s like holding something in a hand that has 50 fingers instead of five. We are truly super-responders,” shares Orloff.
She continues to explain how finding strategies to manage overwhelm helps her more fully enjoy the benefits of her sensitivity. Rather than feel ashamed of her sensitivities, due to common cultural messaging, she learned to support herself.
“At this point in my life, I wouldn’t give up being an empath for anything. It lets me sense the secrets of the Universe and know passion beyond my wildest dreams,” writes Orloff.
***
My emotional regulation rituals
Reducing numbing behaviors has taken many years. Like many others, I over-used alcohol and drugs, for example, to manage the overwhelm and feel “normal.” Getting to the root cause of various escape patterns requires a lot of inner work.
The spiral journey of creating safety in my body feels like a beautiful love story. In my creative projects, “feel the feelings” has been a recurring theme over the past three years. It’s easier said than done. I’ve gradually figured out what works for me. Here are some of my baseline rituals:
- Meditation: Of course, meditation works. Orloff describes many mindfulness tools as supportive strategies.
- Yoga: The practice helps me stay present with my breathing and connected to sensations, rather than getting lost in thought patterns. The slower practices like yin and restorative yoga feel especially nourishing.
- Free-form dance: Doing ecstatic dance regularly helps me honor my full range of emotions and embody the extremes in a relatively safe environment.
- Healthy eating: Orloff describes how food can be “stabilizing” or “destabilizing” for empaths. Learning what works for my finely tuned nervous system helps me grounded and energized.
- High-quality sleep: I feel the difference profoundly in my daily experiences with six hours instead of eight hours of sleep. Empaths and HSPs simply need more sleep.
- Creative projects: My writing, songwriting, and dancing practices feel essential now.
- Breaks from healing: I do so much reading, reflecting, and processing; my therapist helped me see the importance of taking breaks from inner work.
As Julia Cameron points out in “The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity,” healing our inner artist requires becoming healthy. She asks readers to sign a contract to “commit myself to excellent self-care – adequate sleep, diet, exercise, and pampering – for the duration of the course.”
Embracing empath gifts means taking very good care of ourselves.
***
Understanding my distinct experience with empathy helps me feel more self-compassionate and aware of ways to navigate emotions more healthfully.
Find more high-sensitivity and empath inspiration in my previous posts:
- How Loving High Sensitivity Heals Our World
- Why Highly-Sensitive People Love Individuation
- How My 5-Year Meditation Practice Helps Me Heal
Photo Credit: Unsplash, Autumn Goodman
***
I publish inspiring, empowering content on self-actualization topics once a week (Tuesdays). I include insights from personal experience, research, expert advice, and others’ stories. I use my professional journalism and research background to keep posts concise, empathic, and trustworthy.
Join the Weekly Love News here: